In her book Counting the Cost, Jill Duggar details a fight with her father, Jim Bob Duggar, where she called him out for treating her “worse” than her “pedophile brother” Josh Duggar.
In the excerpt published by People on September 9, Jill, 32, recounted a meeting she and her husband, Derick Dillard, had with Jim Bob, 58, and her mother, Michelle Duggar. The family used a mediator during their sit-down, but things still got very heated.
Jill was in tears as she told her father, “You think I’m some kind of horrible person just because I wear pants and have a nose ring … I’m evolving and changing … You treat me like I’m a prodigal who’s turned her back on you. You treat me worse than you treat my pedophile brother.”
Before things took a turn, the 19 Kids and Counting alum told her parents she wanted “to restore family relationships very soon” and “have a good discussion” about “hurtful things” that happened between them. However, Jim Bob was very angry with his daughter.
“He was sitting very still, lips tight, eyes locked in a scowl that had been sculpted out of rock,” she wrote about her father’s expression as he brought up a letter Jill and Derick sent, which Michelle, 56, called “the most disrespectful thing I’ve ever read.”
“I knew she was right, that she was speaking the truth. I didn’t know exactly how I’d messed up, but I knew that I had,” Jill wrote in book, which publishes on September 12. “I’d hurt her and Pops, and that was never my intention.”
Jim Bob then changed the subject and demanded an apology for a text message he received from Jill that called him verbally abusive.
“I was nervous now,” Jill wrote. “I remembered the message, remembered sending it in the hope that it might wake Pops up to how bad I felt things had gotten, to maybe make him give us a little space and let things calm down. I’d written about not wanting to be verbally abused, which was exactly how I’d felt at the time. I’d felt it in El Salvador as well. I wasn’t sure that I could apologize for that. I glanced at Derick as I remained speechless.”
In response to Jill and Derick’s silence, Jim Bob allegedly stormed across the room in an “act of aggression.”
“He towered over me, his whole body fueled with anger. My face flushed red. My eyes filled with tears,” Jill recalled. “Then there was a long, awful silence that I wanted to fill but just couldn’t yet. Derick’s hand was shaking in mine, and I squeezed as hard as I ever had, desperate for him to hold his tongue.”
Jim Bob insisted her physical reaction in that moment was because she felt “guilty” for what had happened between them.
“Pops’ voice was so loud in my ears. His words were like blows,” Jill wrote, noting that Michelle had also began to cry. “I instinctively tried to protect myself and block him out. I curled up on my seat, trying to find safety in some kind of fetal position.”
Things came to a head when Jill called out her father for treating her “worse” than her brother Josh, 35, who molested her and several of their siblings when he was younger. The disgraced reality TV star is currently in prison on charges of downloading and possessing images of child sex abuse.
Jim Bob and Michelle responded to Jill’s claims in a statement to People. “We love all of our children very much. As with any family, few things are more painful than conflicts or problems among those you love. … We do not believe the best way to resolve conflicts, facilitate forgiveness and reconciliation, or to communicate through difficulties is through the media or in a public forum so we will not comment.”