Since she was a child, Brooke Shields has been in front of camera. Commercials, movies, sitcoms, the model-actress has been doing it all since before she knew how to walk. But for the first time, in her new documentary Pretty Baby, she’s in command of what story she tells to the lens – and she doesn’t hold back.
Directed by Lana Wilson, the documentary takes a raw and honest look at span of Brooke’s life: to the infamous Calvin Klein ads, to being raped early on in her acting career, to being dubbed the “most famous virgin in the word”, according to Brooke herself.
Brooke became famous after being unjustly sexualized early in films like 1978’s Pretty Baby, where she played a child prostitute at age 11 and the 1980 film The Blue Lagoon, where she filmed scenes naked at just 14. But in truth, it would be many years later before she actually experienced sex in real life.
In part two of the documentary, Brooke is brutally honest about how she lost her virginity to fellow actor Dean Cain, who famously played Superman in the hit ABC show, Lois & Clark. The pair met while they were both attended Princeton University; she’s posted photos of them together on her Instagram and in the film, archival footage of Brooke is shared of her being interviewed live at school and introducing Dean for the first time as the “special” person in her life.
Though she’s talked about her relationship with Dean in the past, in the documentary, Brooke breaks down not only what happened the night they first slept together, but what their relationship could’ve been if things had been different. “I wanted to jump into the personal relationship and the love and the commitment,” Brooke explains, “The part he was more comfortable with was probably the sexual part and I wasn’t so we had to teach each other about the other.”
But while the learning curve, so to speak, should’ve been fun, Brooke explains that she has ‘built up’ the moment so much, it almost didn’t happen. “He was the first person I trusted with all of it. But I never celebrated our attraction to each other. I never reveled in the sexual relationship between the two of us… The stakes are so unnaturally high that I’m surprised even went through any of it.”
However, they did sleep together, and that night, Brooke remembers being so uncomfortable, she ran from the room, down the hall ‘butt naked’ after they had finished. She remembers he understood “instantly” how she was feeling, but that she didn’t. “I feel bad for that girl. You know, she was old enough to own her own body for real. And you know, just I couldn’t get there at that moment. What it boils down to is sort of a regret for lost exploration and opportunity to understand my personal sexuality.”
While promoting the documentary, Brooke reveals that “a few years back,” she actually apologized to her “loyal and loving” first lie for not making their time together “easy”. “I said, ‘I’m sorry for you, and I’m really sorry for me,’ ” Brooke told PEOPLE. “We had a great relationship, broke up, got back together again after three years. And that should have been a delicious time for me of reveling in it and feeling proud and free because I was in love.”