Hannah Brown has been open about her mental health struggles through the years, especially in her 2021 memoir. The former Bachelorette star revealed exclusively to HollywoodLife.com that before going on Special Forces: World’s Toughest Test, she was “really struggling.” “I had gotten into my mind that I was weak, and so I really wanted this to show me and prove to myself that I was a lot stronger than I thought I was and to learn to trust myself to push through,” Hannah told HL. “I wanted to prove myself wrong basically the whole time [on the show] that I was so much stronger than I thought I was, that I wasn’t weak. I started to believe all these things, probably the worst things people have said about me and started to just work through reminding myself that it’s not true.”
Hannah admitted that while working through the mental and physical adversity of the tests, she “forgot” she was “on a TV show the whole time,” saying, “This was really for me. And that is what made me keep going.” Special Forces follows multiple celebs of different genres, in the depths of the Jordanian desert who are tasked to complete and survive multiple training exercises led by a team of ex-Special Forces operatives. Hannah is currently the only non-professional athlete remaining on the show. “I think I had a moment of, ‘Oh my gosh, I’m surrounded by top athletes and it’s me!” the former pageant queen laughed. “I think that was a big moment of pride for me. It was very validating to have athletes being like, ‘You’re really athletic for not doing any sports!'”
“It really showed me that I do have a grit and resilience, and my grit and resilience is something I should be really proud of. It has probably gotten me through some of the hardest things that I’ve gone through, whether I failed or succeeded,” Hannah continued. “But being able to get past that, I feel like I’ve made a lot of mistakes, gone through a lot of hard times, but I have made the decision to keep going, even if I struggle with my depression.”
Hannah revealed she never lost sight of her “why” for joining Special Forces, and through the multiples tests she faced, she would say to herself, “I’m in a lot of pain right now. I don’t feel good. This is a really bad day, but I know it’ll end. I know that the pain is going to end. It’s going to end. So don’t give up in the time that it’s really hurting because I’ll regret it if I do.” It was this thought process that she credits for pulling her through the competition, as well as other hardships she’s faced in life.
“I’m really, really hard on myself and really struggle with feeling ‘enough,’ And this helped me find a little confidence in that, no, I didn’t just get lucky with all these experiences…I bring something to the table and that is why I’m here now,” she continued. “I learned to believe in myself.”
Catch Hannah on the next episode of Special Forces: World’s Toughest Test on FOX every Wednesday!