Ahead of the release of her documentary, Selena Gomez is opening up more than ever. Selena made a major revelation in her Nov. 3 Rolling Stone interview when she shared that she might not be able to get pregnant due to two medications she takes for her bipolar disorder. “That’s a very big, big present thing in my life,” she admitted. “[But] however I’m meant to have them, I will.”
Selena first opened up about her bipolar disorder diagnosis in April 2020 while appearing on Instagram Live with Miley Cyrus. Her upcoming Apple+ documentary, Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me, will delve further into how she’s dealt with being bipolar, as well as what life was like for her during the time she was diagnosed in 2019. She started “hearing voices” in 2018. leading to an episode of “psychosis,” which is how she ended up in a treatment center, where she eventually got her diagnosis. During that time in treatment, Selena says she was “suspended in paranoia, unable to trust anyone, thinking they were all out to get her,” according to Rolling Stone.
While in treatment, Selena was “loaded up” on medications. It wasn’t until she started seeing a psychiatrist afterward that she finally landed on just two medicines. “I had to detox, essentially, from the medications I was on,” Selena revealed. “I had to learn how to remember certain words. I would forget where I was when we were talking. It took a lot of hard work for me to a) accept that I was bipolar and b) learn how to deal with it because it wasn’t going to go away.”
In total, Selena has spent time in four treatment centers. She said that things started getting “really dark” in her early 20s. “It would start with depression, then it would go into isolation,” Selena shared. “Then it just was me not being able to move from my bed. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. My friends would bring me food because they love me, but none of us knew what it was. Sometimes it was weeks I’d be in bed, to where even walking downstairs would get me out of breath.” It led to her even contemplating suicide, although she never actually attempted it. “I thought the world would be better if I wasn’t there,” Selena said.
Selena’s documentary premieres on Nov. 4. On Nov. 3, she released the title song to the doc, “My Mind & Me,” which detailed her mental health struggles and why she’s been open about them to help others.