Okay lets get this out of the way: there is no secret to giving good head. Head is head, and as long as your guy orgasms at the end, you’ve done good. But, there are ways to make the experience more pleasurable for you and your partner. And even if you think you’re doing a great job while you’re down there, it’s always fun to switch things up a little bit! So we spoke to two highly qualified sex experts — Sean Jameson of the Bad Girls Bible and New York City sex therapist Stephen Snyder, MD — who also happen to be males. It was a two-for-one deal. Anyway, lets get to the good stuff!
1.) Remember that giving a blow job is not rocket science. “When you think about it, giving your man oral sex is no more complicated than kissing, but it will feel a lot more pleasurable for him,” Sean told HollywoodLife.com. “If you’ve never given a blow job before, then it can sound daunting, but at it’s easiest, you just need to slowly lick his shaft and the head of his penis without ever taking him into your mouth… and that will be enough to give most men a really intense orgasm.” There’s no reason to be scared, you’ve got this!
2.) Enthusiasm is everything. No, seriously — everything. “There is no technique more powerful and enjoyable for your man than being with an enthusiastic partner when you’re giving him oral sex, and the same is true for regular sex too,” Sean said. “Think about it for a moment: imagine being with a guy who knows every technique imaginable, but is completely disengaged and even bored when he’s intimate with you,” Sean explained. “He’s not even making eye contact with you and you can see it on his face how he’s not in the moment.” That sounds like a real bummer, right? Well, Sean said next think about “being with a guy who enthusiastically and passionately desires you, looking at you like he wants to eat you. It’s intoxicating. That’s the power of being enthusiastic when going down on your man. So show him how enthusiastic you are for him.”
3.) Make sure you’re comfortable. “Do what you need to feel comfortable. For instance, if you don’t enjoy deep oral penetration, just take the tip of his penis in your mouth and the shaft in your hand,” said Dr. Stephen, author of Love Worth Making, which is due out February 2018. “That way, he can’t penetrate any farther than you want him to. You’ll be more able to relax and enjoy the experience!” Dr. Stephen also added that you shouldn’t “worry too much about making oral sex better for your partner. Make sure it’s good for you! Passion counts for a lot — as in every other part of sex.”
4.) Don’t be afraid to use your hands. As Sean puts it, “it’s not cheating”. You have two hands so you should definitely be using them! So, what should you be doing with your hands? “While you’re give him a blow job with your mouth, you can use one hand to give him a hand job at the same time while using your other hand to massage his balls or even give him some prostate pleasure,” Sean explained. He also added that men “want to feel slightly different sensations each time to keep things interesting,” which is something to keep in mind while going down.
5.) Spit or swallow? Um, who cares? It almost goes without saying that women feel pressured to swallow while going down, mostly due to the widespread misconception that that is what men want out of receiving oral sex. According to Sean, “most men aren’t concerned” with what you do at the end, and he doesn’t think women should be, either. “I always advise that you should try everything at least once and then decide afterwards whether your enjoy it or not,” Sean said. “Of course, if you are repulsed by the idea, you shouldn’t feel compelled to do it.” For more blow job tips from Sean, click here.
6.) Men just want to be desired, too. This goes hand-in-hand with enthusiasm, but it’s still good to remember. “The essential thing is that he wants to feel you desire him,” Dr. Stephen added. “You know how most women love it when a man adores and treasures their body? Most men wish a woman would adore and treasure their penis like that.” In fact, Dr. Stephen believes that it’s their eagerness for “passionate attention” that creates the “yearn” for oral sex from their partners.
Tell us, HollywoodLifers — What do YOU think about all of this expert advice on giving a blow job? Comment below, let us know!