Hannah Brown Admits To ‘Volatile’ Relationship With ‘DWTS’ Partner Alan Bersten: ‘I Couldn’t Take It’

In her new book, Hannah Brown discusses her tumultuous relationship with her ‘DWTS’ partner. She opened up about it further on the HL podcast.

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Hannah Brown appeared as though she was thoroughly enjoying every tango, foxtrot, salsa and cha-cha she did while on season 28 of Dancing With The Stars. The Mirror Ball-winning former Bachelorette was all smiles alongside her partner, Alan Bersten, and never hinted at the fact that she was struggling behind closed doors, after enduring one heartbreak after another. Now, in her new book God Bless This Mess, Hannah reveals she was “emotionally unwell” and “cried pretty much every single night” during that time in her life. She also admits to having “the most volatile relationship of the season, by far,” with her partner, Alan, despite their incredible winning streak.

“Alan hadn’t won the Mirror Ball on his side, too, so we both were just really competitive and put everything into it. But with that, it caused a lot of friction, because… he is a professional dancer, I’m not a professional dancer,” Hannah explained further on the HollywoodLife Podcast. “He wanted to push me as hard as I could be pushed physically, but emotionally, sometimes I couldn’t take it. We have very different communication styles, and so that that really caused a lot of friction, when you can’t really get on the same level of being able to communicate and he has so many other emotions involved, because this is his life. This is his career.”

She added that the duo put “so much pressure on themselves and on each other. “In the end, it was a hard time, there was so much that people didn’t see, but, it’s one of those things that was tough, but we won, and we were happy and we still have a lot of respect for each other.”

Hannah’s emotions were especially high leading into her Dancing With The Stars journey, as she reveals in her new book that her ex Tyler Cameron was photographed on a date with Gigi Hadid, just two days after he was spotted leaving Hannah’s home in LA. She recalls her former contestant had given her “every indication that he wanted to try” to rekindle their relationship, before returning to NYC and telling Hannah, “You got to date thirty guys, so I’m gonna date around and see if I want to be with you.” The former Miss Alabama tells her readers she felt as though she could “never trust a man again,” which she was forced to do days later at her first grueling DWTS rehearsal.

“I was not okay. I probably needed a break, to take the time to heal. I’m so thankful for my time on Dancing With The Stars, but at that time, I probably was not in the best place emotionally,” Hannah opened up on the HL Podcast. “I’m far away from home — I literally had a couch and a mattress, and I don’t know anybody except for on the show. And yet, I’m still trying to process what the heck just happened to me. And I think for me, I was like ‘I need to win,’ I need to win in life because I’ve just like lost, lost, lost, lost.”

The former Bachelorette star got her win and deserved it, too. Despite recalling feeling “emotionless” and “empty” when she was announced as winner of Dancing With The Stars, Hannah now looks back on the experience fondly and as an important chapter in her life. You can read more about the pivotal, groundbreaking, faith-inspiring moments in her new book, God Bless This Mess: Learning to Live and Love Through Life’s Best (and Worst) Moments, which is currently on sale now.