Billie Eilish Recalls Feeling ‘Anger’ Toward Her Appearance After Hip Injury: My Body Was ‘Gaslighting’ Me
While struggling with a dance injury that she suffered when she was 13 — and the years of misdiagnosis that followed — Billie Eilish says it took her a while to realize her body ‘is not out to get me.’
“Going through my teenage years of hating myself and all that stupid sh-t, a lot of it came from my anger toward my body,” Billie Eilish says in a January 2023 interview with Vogue, “and how mad I was at how much pain it’s caused me, and how much I’ve lost because of things that happened to it.” Billie, 21, pointed out that she suffered a growth plate injury in her hip when she was 13, dashing her hopes as a dancer. “I got injured right after we made ‘Ocean Eyes’ [in 2015], so music kind of replaced dancing.”
What followed was “years of subsequent lower body injuries, and just as many misdiagnoses,” according to Vogue. Billie would eventually discover through her movement coach, Kristina Cañizares, that her pains and aches could be attributed to a condition called hypermobility. Treatments that generally help people – like certain massages – could hurt Billie. “I felt like my body was gaslighting me for years,” Eilish told Vogue. “I had to go through a process of being like, My body is actually me. And it’s not out to get me.”
While Billie was open about her own body issues in the 2023 Vogue feature, the point of the cover was to discuss the “My Future” singer’s environmental efforts. Billie “invited a group of young climate activists and organizers to join her for a day of conversation about the future of the planet” for the magazine’s first-ever video cover.
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![EXCLUSIVE: Billie Eilish shows off her new haircut inspired by her mom's hair as she says she is 'Happier than Ever.' Billie was seen leaving a studio with her brother Finneas in Santa Monica. The pair were seen leaving after shooting a new music video for their new album 'Happier than ever', Billie wore an oversized shirt and was seen rocking her new short hair that she claims was inspired by her mom. 24 Aug 2021 Pictured: Billie Eilish and Finneas O'Connell. Photo credit: Tom Nook/MEGA TheMegaAgency.com +1 888 505 6342 (Mega Agency TagID: MEGA781051_036.jpg) [Photo via Mega Agency]](https://develop.hollywoodlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/MEGA781051_036.jpg?fit=160%2C240&resize=160%2C240)
![Billie Eilish has teamed up with sportswear giant Nike to raise awareness about climate change. The singer sat down with Dr Ayana Elizabeth Johnson to discuss how to think globally and act locally "to make your voice heard". "You don't have to be called an activist to talk about what's right," said 19-year-old Billie. "Climate justice is making sure that everyone has an equal opportunity for a healthy and safe life," said Dr Ayana Elizabeth Johnson. The Talking Trash content series launched on Earth Day [April 22]. It will feature conversations between young leaders and some of the world’s leading climate experts. Credit Nike.com/MEGA. 05 May 2021 Pictured: Billie Eilish talks in the Talking Trash series. Photo credit: NIKE.COM/MEGA TheMegaAgency.com +1 888 505 6342 (Mega Agency TagID: MEGA751928_002.jpg) [Photo via Mega Agency]](https://develop.hollywoodlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/billie-eilish-blonde-hair-mega-1.jpg?fit=160%2C240&resize=160%2C240)
“I don’t want to be parading around like, Look at me! I’m making a difference,” Billie says of her efforts. “I just want to be making the difference and shutting the f-ck up about it. … I shouldn’t be making any products. I shouldn’t be selling anything. It’s just more sh-t to go into the landfill one day. I know that. But no one’s going to stop wearing clothes. No one’s going to stop making stuff. So I just do it in the best way I possibly can.”
While her hip injury derailed her ambitions of becoming a professional dancer, Billie continues to embrace her body’s movement whenever possible. On Dec. 29, she posted an Instagram gallery full of different moments from her “life,” including a clip of her dancing along to Justin Bieber’s song “Right Here.”